My Thanksgiving's 2006

 

To the Tinéf
For myself and in sharing for anyone who was wronged.

My Thanksgiving

A specific recognition placed here to project as a metaphor for all other times I wish to have said and in the recognition of the need to be said.

After 36 years of true devotion, within my life’s ever belief of loving one woman forever, her betrayal of me was colossal. Engulfed by constant fatigues and moods of our earliest days begun manifesting her depressant genes, and surfacing childhood abuse residue, effects which developed toward regular mental epilepsy and episodes of true madness.

I stood by her all the way while creating our lives on my own, as few hours of whatever activity left her drained of all energy for days. Most of her evil bursts came as uncontrollable need directed toward me while I lived my inborn loyalty makeup, living daily my vow of for better or for worse. Actively shielding the world form knowing her sickly life misery, mine by default, as such was her innermost wish.

Past decades soaked harm and negativity in Machiavellian five year effort behind my back, most skillfully she wiped out my life of three and one half decades. By lies, by concealed, immoral if legal maneuvers, manipulating me by enlisting my trust to act unknowingly against my own good.

At a point, vehicled by divorce proceedings, she destroyed all that I loved, all that I created, all that I owned, most of , my friendships and relations, collections that I formed, all of my life as I knew it to be, I lost it all. As one of her then closest, in a moment of unguarded conscious voiced it to me by phone; “Watch out how you cross the street from now on, as she aims to destroy you and will never stop.”

Then in my way of detaching from such vast evil and harm, I renamed her, “the Tinéf.”
(Yiddish for spiritually unclean.) By way of facing it all and accurately redefine her being. And here I am, to permanently relate unequivocally to the Tinéf my deepest gratitude for doing what she did. Had she not done so I would have never come to North Carolina, never have found my mountain top. I would have not met my Odem Love, the love of my life and with her known closeness, kindness, caring, serenity, the sharing and contributing for and with others, peace of mind and energized creativity the likes which I have never known.

This acknowledgment is no less a metaphor to other times I wish to have said so.

It is the sharing of my posted wish with any and all who might benefit by such.

It is a genuine, true act and of no other agenda, just as this posting is done in deep belief.

I am most grateful and here ever after giving thanks to the one who demolished my life as I knew it to be, the one I call the Tinéf.

 

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Furniture 1965 | Haircut 1966 | Have a Ball 1966 | Jewelry 1967 | Water Birthing Tub 1996
The Southern Confederacy 13 Stars 1997 | Healing, Health, & Leisure 2005 | My Thanksgiving's 2006

 

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